Free To Live!

Desiring to be thinner is not a bad thing. It’s nearly impossible to live in America and not be influenced by the culture of thinness that we swim in every day. Where I ran into problems was when my identity and self esteem were damaged.  I had bought the and it held me captive. I believed that when I got thinner, I would be a better person. I would be more worthy. I would be more valuable. 

In the 80’s and 90’s diet culture was in full force! Advertising, family dinners, magazine covers, friends, Bible studies, EVERYTHING was somehow influenced. As a young person in those days I took this very much to heart. I felt I was too big. My feet were big. My hands were big. My butt and thighs were too big. Only thing that wasn’t too big was my height and my waist wasn’t too bad. Not a great self assessment, was it? I had a core belief that I was too big to be worthy.

Our enemy had used these messages to keep me depressed, discouraged, and distracted. He had me very solidly captive in this area of my life. Even as a follower of Jesus, my relationship with Him was less than it should be because I misunderstood His truth in this area of my life. I was depressed because I was too big, I couldn’t lose weight, and I wouldn’t be accepted until I was smaller and it was not working! I was discouraged because I read all the headlines where others were having great success! It seemed possible for others but not for me. All of this yammering in my head kept me distracted from the things that I was created to be and do. From my understanding, God would be ready to use me once I was smaller and acceptable. 

For years I had no words for all of this, it was just the way it was. It was reality to me and I didn’t even know there was another way.

More recently, different messages began getting through. Reels where she was putting words to these things that had lived in my head for so long. Verses took on new meaning when read from a different perspective. Truth that seemed to be too good to be true started to set some roots in my heart. 

And I was HOPEFUL for the first time in a long time. 

Core truths which have set me free: 

1) Being thin does not equal being good nor does being big equal being bad. 

2) Food has no moral value. 

3) I am able to fulfill God’s purpose for me now, at this current size. 

4) My body is good. 

5) Food is made for our pleasure. 

If you feel that you are held captive in a similar way that I was, check out LiveWell with SonyaKathryn. It is an 18 lesson, self paced course which will walk you through the process of breaking free and stepping into a delicious new freedom with food and your body! It is autobiographical; teaches Biblical truth, intuitive eating practices, how supplements played a role in my story; and has lots of opportunities to respond with simple tasks and journaling. 

It is for our freedom that Christ died. Let’s live it!